I’ve been praying lately that I would have a prayer song come into my heart for my trip to Zimbabwe. Something that would lead and guide my heart in preparation for the trip, but also as I discern where God is leading me with missions.

Today, I believe I have found my prayer song.

“Oceans (Where My Feet May Fail)” by Hillsong United:

My favorite line is this:

“Spirit lead me where my trust is without borders
Let me walk upon the waters
Wherever You would call me
Take me deeper than my feet could ever wander
And my faith will be made stronger
In the presence of my Savior…”

WOW. I still get “God-bumps” (as my Daddy likes to call them) each and every time I hear that song and read those lyrics. This is my prayer as I journey into an unknown place, across the ocean, further than I ever dreamed or imagined my feet would take me.

Do you have a prayer song? Or is there a song that has guided you in a time of need, heartache, growth, etc.? I’d love to hear!

Dear Ashley,
An anonymous gift and a very special $10 that was handed to me by a very special 11 year old boy. Patrick is working to pay his own way to three weeks at Casowasco this summer, and took this $10 from his earnings because he thinks what you are doing is so important and exciting.

The first thing that tugged at my heart was reading “anonymous” and “11 year old boy.” These two people have never met me, and yet, they want to help ME and donate to my mission trip!

Secondly… this little boy is taking from his saving for summer camp because he believes in me and thinks what I am doing is “so important and exciting”. Wow! And he’s not just attending any camp, but the camp I have called home since I was 11 years old myself.

I could never imagine myself reaching out as a kid and wanting to give up my hard earned cash to a complete stranger.

I cried reading the letter not just because these two are strangers, but because I wish I had faith like their’s. They don’t know me. They have never met me. They’re taking a chance on me and this call I have felt in my heart since January.

Yep! I know I have a lot of growing and trusting to do in my own heart. I will be following up here when I am able to process these thoughts and prayers about the changes going on in my heart.

In the meantime, I can’t wait to return from Africa and meet Patrick. I anticipate the moment I am able to share with him about my adventure and what his $10 meant to me.

“Therefore, whoever humbles himself like this child is the greatest in the kingdom of heaven.” Matthew 18:4

Morgue File Image

When I talk about my upcoming mission trip to Africa with friends and family, I’m often told, “I don’t know how you’re doing it!” “I could never go to a new country for 2 weeks.” “I don’t like new places, new things.”

I find it rather hilarious that people express those concerns about themselves to me, because in all honesty… I feel the same way! If I can’t picture myself in a new place, with new people, I get anxious, panicky. While I’m often described as bubbly, outgoing, friendly, I have a fear of new experiences. In new situations, I clam up. I become this silent, shy girl.

But when I was asked about pursing this mission opportunity to Zimbabwe in January, something told me to get out of the boat, to move beyond my comfort zone, face my fear of new things. Last week at our mission team meeting, I led the devotional (way out of my comfort zone since I’m still learning members of the team!). Each time I began to prepare something inspirational to say, I kept coming back to Matthew 14, when Jesus and Peter walk on water. It reminded me of the book by John Ortberg, If You Want to Walk on Water, You’ve Got to Get Out of the Boat. And given my current fears, hesitations, this quote jumped out:

“I believe there is something – Someone – inside us who tells us there is more to life than sitting in the boat. You were made for something more than merely avoiding failure. There is something inside you that wants to walk on the water – to leave the comfort of routine existence and abandon yourself to the high adventure of following God.”

Yep. That’s me. I do believe I’m made for something more. I believe we all are! If that means stepping so far of out of my comfort zone, getting on a plane for 18 hours, and sharing God’s love to those in Zimbabwe, Africa… then I’ll go! I’m ready for this new adventure.

One of my favorite songs recently is by Josh Wilson, “I Refuse.” The chorus always rings so true:

“…’Cause I don’t want to live like I don’t care. I don’t want to say another empty prayer. I refuse to Sit around and wait for someone else To do what God has called me to do myself. I could choose Not to move but I refuse…”

I made a declaration to myself Jan. 1, 2013 that this year was the year I wasn’t going to plan. Nope. No plans. I said I was going to leave my calendar open, stop being so tedious about planning out my whole life, and just live. Little did I know, God already had plans for me in the works.

This past December, I came across a posting on Facebook about one of our Upper New York VIM team’s creating a group to go to Zimbabwe, Africa. I interact on a pretty regular basis with the team leader to update their webpage and figured I would send an email to get some more information from her.

After some correspondence with the team leader and discussion with Trevor, I thought, “Eh, maybe it’s not for me,” and left it at that.

About a month later, I received another email from the team leader with some web updates and a little “P.S” at the bottom saying:

PS – Are you still thinking about coming to Zimbabwe with us? Love to have you!

I went home that same day, with the application in hand and said to Trevor, “I think I’m going to do it. I’m going to go to Africa.”

Isn’t it crazy when something just starts to line up? When you stop making plans and God starts to fill in the details of your life?

For the first time, I’ve started to step back and truly rely on God. I need get out of my own way, to stop being so controlling, acting like the boss (as my loving family can attest to), and let God guide me.

So, yep. I leave for Zimbabwe, Africa July 13, 2013. I  couldn’t be more excited (or more scared!) to see what God has laid out for me!

I’ll continue to blog about Africa in these coming months as we lead up to July 13! I can’t wait to share in this journey.

I’ve been doing a lot of reflecting the last few days as 2012 draws to a close, and I keep trying to come up with those usual “what have I accomplished” lists, what goals I have met or didn’t met, what do I have to show for the past 12 months.

And at first, I said, “Nothing. I’ve done nothing this year. I have nothing to show.” I began wallowing at how lame my life is compared to others. How nothing exciting ever happens to me. How I must be a failure.

But then I stepped back…

• I vacationed in Las Vegas, Utah, and Tuscon, which included crossing off “riding in a convertible” of my bucket list.
  

• I traveled to Tampa, West Virginia, and DC for work. All which were amazing experiences and included some life-changing events (more on that later).

• I lost my uncle, but found a desire to begin expressing to family members what they mean to me before it’s too late.
• I grew to LOVE my job in a way I could have never imagined.
• Some friendships were lost, and some were created, and some deepened.
• I began to use Facebook (when I was ready to delete my page completely) as a way to encourage others in a time where I needed encouragement the most.
  

  (via: http://pinterest.com/pin/244038873528045665/)

• I started at a gym in December to get my health back in order (instead of waiting for the New Year to begin!) and and stepped out of my comfort zone by attending classes all by myself.
• Received my first tattoo I’ve been dreaming of since I was 16, and serves as a reminder to love God, love others, and love myself.

And while this is a great “list” and shows some of what I’ve “done” in 2012, nothing compares to my biggest accomplishment this year…

Finding myself.

As cliche as this sounds, it’s true. In 2012 and my 26th year of life, I found myself. Found my place in life. Learned to love myself again. Learned to love life again. Learned to love God again.

I believe, as my mom likes to put it… I found my “Ashley sparkle.” And this time, it’s for good.

I can’t take all of the credit for doing this alone. Oh no, no, no… I did this with the help of God, my family, my friends, my coworkers. Each and every person I encountered this year pushed me, stretched me, loved me, encouraged me in ways that many of them probably didn’t even realize!

Now, I’m not saying I’m “done” with the process of finding myself… because there will never be an end to that!

But I am well on my way.

Life’s been hard lately, I’m not going to lie. But I have the greatest family and truest friends to hold me up, encourage me, and inspire me.

(via)

To get back into the swing of things, I’m going simple. Back to the basics. I asked my friends and family on Facebook to share their favorite inspirational, positive, uplifting song! And man did I get responses! I did some hunting myself, and this is the list I came up with. I’m sure there’s LOTS missing, and EVERYTHING is included in this list… from Miley Cyrus to Johnny Cash to Queen!

Here’s a list to get us started:

Selena Gomez – Who Says (http://youtu.be/BzE1mX4Px0I)
Andy Grammer – Keep Your Head Up (http://youtu.be/CmrOB_q3tjo)
Miley Cyrus – The Climb (http://youtu.be/NG2zyeVRcbs)
Mercy Me – Keep Singing (http://youtu.be/GF_yLdxTSgQ)
Ashley Ballard – Don’t Get Lost in the Crowd (http://youtu.be/SrZtrEnXEr8)
Natasha Bedingfield – Unwritten (http://youtu.be/b7k0a5hYnSI)
Casting Crowns – Courageous (http://youtu.be/pkM-gDcmJeM)
Carole King – Beautiful (http://youtu.be/aJn3QJYYBr0)
Lady Gaga – Born This Way (http://youtu.be/wV1FrqwZyKw)
Casting Crowns – Praise You in This Storm (http://youtu.be/Ype1xE0wzsg)
Jessie J – Who You Are (http://youtu.be/j2WWrupMBAE)
Katy Perry – Firework (http://youtu.be/QGJuMBdaqIw)
R. Kelly – The World’s Greatest (http://youtu.be/WgcovIu3k9o)
I Believe – Yolanda Adams (http://youtu.be/849Yor3oS-o)
Michael Jackson – Man in the mirror (http://youtu.be/PivWY9wn5ps)
Ginny Owens – If You Want Me To (http://youtu.be/QtNzOpKvPfw)
R. Kelly – I Believe I Can Fly (http://youtu.be/kFN3l2NuoE0)
Switchfoot – I Dare You to Move (http://youtu.be/iOTcr9wKC-o)
Katrina and the Waves – Walkin’ on Sunshine (http://youtu.be/iPUmE-tne5U)
U2 – It’s A Beautiful Day (http://youtu.be/co6WMzDOh1o)
Journey – Don’t Stop Believin’ (http://youtu.be/2NQIPVqLMUg)
Kelly Clarkson – Breakaway (http://youtu.be/c-3vPxKdj6o)
Wicked – Defying Gravity (http://youtu.be/FlMBcTGJ4YM)
Mandisa – Stronger (http://youtu.be/emgv-VRtMEU)
Mandisa – Waiting For Tomorrow (http://youtu.be/O5VlRwoaf8k)
Israel Kamakawiwo’Ole – Somewhere Over the Rainbow (http://youtu.be/w_DKWlrA24k)
John Barrowman – I Made it Through the Rain (http://youtu.be/6jgsOHoznBc)
Christy Nockels – Waiting Here For You (http://youtu.be/J3OEGnH5x8g)
Building 429 – Where I Belong (http://youtu.be/jVeXOMHNgLQ)
Kathryn Scott – What A Friend (http://youtu.be/HaaQC3xPVfE)
Phil Wickham – You’re Beautiful (http://youtu.be/QGlTzH9xkXQ)
Jason Mraz – Make it Mine (http://youtu.be/V6Mclgw89nk)
Des’ree – You Gotta Be (http://youtu.be/JhpZfltbnAQ)
Heather Smalls – Proud (http://youtu.be/ecklqEo9QQc)
Eminem – Not Afraid (http://youtu.be/j5-yKhDd64s)
Michael Jackson – Smile (http://youtu.be/iiKJmBgAfFE)
Kutless – What Faith Can Do (http://youtu.be/u1JBSQMkQEo)
Britt Nicole – All This Time (http://youtu.be/nNcx209-vrA)
Sarah McLachlan – Hold On (http://youtu.be/MHBmpGLGyk8)
Johnny Cash – I Won’t Back Down (http://youtu.be/yiLiTpBfpQM)
Lion King – Hakuna Matata (http://youtu.be/7Ai53uYyUzg)
Queen – We Are the Champions (http://youtu.be/04854XqcfCY)
Christina Aguilera – Beautiful (http://youtu.be/eAfyFTzZDMM)
Kelly Clarkson – Stronger (What Doesn’t Kill You) (http://youtu.be/Xn676-fLq7I)
Bon Jovi – Living on a Prayer (http://youtu.be/lDK9QqIzhwk)
Tim McGraw – Live Like You Were Dying (http://youtu.be/XiOcW_YR1G8)
Survivor – Eye of the Tiger (http://youtu.be/btPJPFnesV4)
Bobby McFerrin – Don’t Worry Be Happy (http://youtu.be/d-diB65scQU)
Jason Mraz – Live High (http://youtu.be/trJeelxl4mo)
Destiny’s Child – Survivor (http://youtu.be/N9fr5QkDWYs)
Vanessa Hudgens – Never Underestimate a Girl (http://youtu.be/vFUp_vpZPVI)
Rodney Atkins – If You’re Going Through Hell (http://youtu.be/91OQwco7a58)
Rascal Flatts – Stand (http://youtu.be/G_Vzpjv_kR4)
Johnny Nash – I Can See Clearly Now (http://youtu.be/HagzTRmUBIE)
Lindsey Kane – Measure of Beauty (http://youtu.be/WzmP7IZgaUM)
Alicia Keys – Superwoman (http://youtu.be/hcYQeBGQyGU)
Jason Mraz – Life is Wonderful (http://youtu.be/kmNqFeSjDAo)
Rent – Seasons of Love (http://youtu.be/x8iTeDl_Wug)

Whenever you have a hard day or need a pick me up, I hope these songs will bring a smile to your face!

(via)

Tell me, what is your favorite inspirational song?

So first… WE BOUGHT A HOUSE. And we started moving, last weekend. And it’s crazy. We love it! It’s perfect for us. I will be sure to post more photos soon!

Next, I GOT A PROMOTION. I went from “Communications Assistant” to “Multimedia/Web Coordinator”. I’m excited! I’ll be doing much of the same thing that I am right now (web stuff, social media updates, video editing, etc.), but the position will be developing and changing as things go along.

And… I WILL be back to regular exercising, cooking, and blogging… as soon as we purchase a new computer. Our lovely little laptop went kuput a few weeks ago.

In our new house, I have my own dedicated yoga room! I can’t wait to paint and design it. I’ll keep you posted with those updates as well!

So what have I been up to since January 30?

1. I GOT A JOB! It’s a job I LOVE! February 15 I began working as a Communications Assistant with The Upper New York Annual Conference of The United Methodist church. And yes, it is a mouthful. My main responsibility is maintaining the website, database, and social media venues. Each and every day is different, and I couldn’t ask for a better team to work with!
2. Downside to the job? Traveling 1 hour and 10 minutes EACH WAY to work! Again, I love my job… and I plan on staying here for a mucho long time. I’ve learned to live with the drive, enjoy it, and even learn new things (welcome to Podcasts and books on CD). So my day really begins at 7ish-am until 6ish-pm (on a good day).
3. I’ve been LIVIN’ life while I’ve been gone too! Trevor and I have taken a few small roadtrips (at Easter and for our 1st Anniversary). And I’ve done a few other fun things like a wine tour with my sisters and my mom.

I also can tell you what I have NOT been up to lately:

1. Keeping up with my 25@25 (will be revisiting that soon).
2. Running.
3. Good time management.

So here’s to the future! I have lots in mind for my little space on the inter-webs. And I can’t wait to get started!

The Flower City Challenge website describes the weekend on their website:

Unity Health System Rochester Flower City Challenge – April 30th & May 1st, 2011

Four events over two days showcasing Rochester, NY’s neighborhoods, history and riverways. Something for everyone!

April 30th – River Challenge Duathlon (run/bike/run)
April 30th – River Challenge Triathlon (run/bike/kayak or canoe)

May 1st – Unity Health System Rochester Flower City Challenge Half Marathon (13.1 Miles)
May 1st – Wegmans Family 5K (3.1 Miles)

I’m stinkin’ excited… and petrified! I can’t wait to start training (haven’t run much since the It’s A Wonderful Run 5k on December 1th!), and I plan to follow Hal Higdon’s Half Marathon Training: Novice.

Training officially begins on Monday, February 7th!

Besides Trevor, myself, Camille, and Josh… Dave (@MonB4V), Camille’s boyfriend Andy, Kelly and Marissa (Facebookers) were also there! Most of us did the belay training, and then climbed for awhile. I’d say it was a success!

I also have to admit, however… I was quite petrified of climbing! I’m not sure if it was the heights (which I’ve never had a problem with before) or the fact that it was something new (or that I was trusting my life in Trevor’s hands), and I didn’t really know what I was doing. I stuck with it, and successfully climbed for a little while. But the truth is… goodness gracious I need to get to a gym and work on my upper body strength!

Here’s a few photos I took while on the ground:

Trevor was nervous I wasn’t going to hold him. I was nervous too. And so was the belay trainer. But no need to worry – I never dropped him… hard. Just kidding.

Here’s Camille (@CampanaroCA)!

Dave (@MonB4V) belaying Josh (@FOREperform) – The experts!

And just because I wanted proof that I actually climbed, here’s me “bouldering” right before we left. I did actually climb though, or at least attempt to.

Thanks, everyone, for a great afternoon! And woohoo – I can add it to my 25@25 list!